Dear Shane

    Every year I write a letter to Shane on his birthday and on the anniversary of his death.  I do this to simply let out all of the emotions that I tend to keep bottled up inside.  Journaling has always been a great way for me to sort through my thoughts and emotions.  I've kept a journal since I was very young and it definitely has helped me get through some pretty tough times in my life.  So I thought I would share the letter that I wrote to Shane today on the anniversary of his death.  Today was no exception as I wiped away many tears during the composition of this letter.  This letter is not beautifully crafted.  It is not filled with profound words.  It is not grammatically correct.  It is simply filled with the thoughts, words, and emotions that I was feeling as pen hit paper.


Dear Shane,
        I don't really know where to start.  3 years ago the news of your death stunned and shocked me.  You would be 24 years old.  Still so young, still so much to accomplish in life.  The hurt of losing you is still there, but time certainly does ease the pain.  Today I want to remember you, although I think of you often.  Today I've decided that instead of moping around and feeling sorry for myself I'm going to enjoy this day with my family.  You gave me new perspective on what is important in life.  Relationships and people are the most important thing.  Not the things I own, the place I live, or the things I do to fill up my time.  Because really, when you look back at it all, thats all you will remember and take with you.  I remember after you died just staring at all of your stuff.  I remember thinking, it's just stuff and you just leave it.  You can't take any of it with you.  It's just there for others to sort through.
        My life is forever changed because of you.  I know I tell you that every year, but it truly is.  I wouldn't be the person that I am if you wouldn't have died that day.  It sucks that we have to learn the hard way.  Almost always thats what it takes.  You probably just look down on us and shake your head saying "If you only knew."  Yeah, we can be pretty stupid some times.
       I yearn to give you one last hug.  A hug that would have truly meant something.  A hug that says "Goodbye.  We'll see each other again soon…or not so soon."  3 years feels so long.  You probably would have said something to make me laugh.  Some silly movie quote like "Shhhh, I hate goodbyes!" I loved when you said that.  It made me laugh every time.
       Kris misses playing guitar with you, and Guitar Hero.  He wonders why we never get to play it at the cabin anymore.  I said because it reminds us of you.
       Molly talks about you in Heaven.  How you're up there with Joey and her brothers or sisters that she never got to meet.  She always says that she can't wait to go to Heaven and be with you all!
       John won't ever know you but I will tell him all about you.  You would have make and awesome uncle to him.
       Shane I imagine that you would have come to India to visit us with the rest of the family.  Although I probably wouldn't be here if you were still alive.  When people die you do crazy things with your life.  But, you loved adventure and I'm sure you would have enjoyed being here.
       I miss you brother more than I can express with words.  Your life was way to short but I am grateful for the 21 years that I did get to spend with you.  I fervently prayed for your existence.  April and I prayed every night that God would give us a brother and He did.  So today I thank God for giving me you as my brother.  I thank God for all of the things you have taught me in your life and death.  Today I thank God for my own family and I hug them all a little closer and all a little tighter because of you.  Life is short, too short and I try to cherish each moment the Lord gives me.  Thank you for teaching me that.  I love you

              Forever your sister,
                           Becky Jo

Stairs and Stares

              Well this week I officially lost it.  Yet another stranger, this time at the local botanical garden, wanted a picture of my child.  On this particular occasion the stranger started taking pictures, without asking, while my child was having a severe temper tantrum meltdown.  It had been a long day and I finally blew up at this stranger.  "STOP IT!  Now that's enough!  She's having a moment here and now you need to stop!" The stranger walked away with a smirk on her face.  

             Being white in India is somewhat similar to a being a celebrity in America.  Everybody stares at you, wants a photo with you, pinches your kid's cheeks, picks them up without asking, grabs their arms…you get the idea.  I've grown somewhat used to the stares and I've learned which places I need to protect my children from grabby strangers.  I've also gotten used to the occasional request for a photo.  However, on this particular day it was about the 100th request for a photo and we had spent the earlier half of our day at the Foreigners registration office (major headache).  So, it was almost a matter of time before one of these lovely Indians got their head chewed off.  We all have moments when we crack.  

          I had been wanting to post this for a few months, but was waiting for the appropriate time to do so.  I guess this week seemed fitting since I lost my cool.  So here are some pictures of all of the STARES we get.  I have also included some pictures of some of the many STAIRS that we climb.    Due to overpopulation/limited space everything is built up, up, up.  Almost everywhere you go you climb stairs to get to your location.  Luckily you can almost always find an elevator nearby as well.  However these elevators are very, very tiny.  We have a hard time fitting our family of four in most of the elevators, especially when we have the carseat.  (Yes, we have been using a carseat for John…most of the time).  

        

           I hope you enjoy these pictures.  All of them are taken with complete strangers.  

Which one of these is not like the other?

Usually they want a picture with Kris or Molly, so I was pretty pumped when I got asked  for a photo.  

I should have counted how many times Sam got asked for a photo while we were in Mysore.  He was  a good sport about it.  

I think this fellow had a thing for Jilliann.

Some of the many stairs we climbed while on vacation.

More stairs.  Nothing is handicap accessible. I don't know how anyone in a wheelchair would function here. 

Has anyone else had an experience like this?  Maybe you are the one asking for photos with complete strangers. Hopefully next time I can calmly respond…we'll see :)

Once Upon a Jackfruit...

Since moving to India we have discovered a whole new world of produce!  We have enjoyed trying many new types of fruits and veggies.  One of these fruits is especially unique in my opinion.  I had never heard of it or seen it until we moved here.  It is called….Jackfruit.  What a cool name for a piece of produce, right?  It's big, it's fragrant, it's messy, and it's very tasty.  

This first picture shows how jackfruit grow.  They grow in a tree.  We spied these babies at Cubon Park back in May.  

This is typically how you would see them being sold.  Just all stacked up on the side of the road waiting for someone to buy them.  

We heard that Jackfruit are a beast to cut and peal, so we had never been interested in buying a whole fruit ourselves.  But thanks to Margaret (Kris' secretary at the office), we were gifted with this baby.  

This one is a medium sized fruit.  I've definitely seen smaller, and I've also seen larger ones. 

This is what it looks like when you start to cut and peel out the pieces of fruit.  It is a sticky mess.  You have to put oil on your hands prior to digging in so that your hands don't get too sticky.  

This is what the fruit looks like once you get it all peeled out.  Our medium Jackfruit probably contained at least 50 pieces of smaller fruit inside.  

This is the Jackfruit cut into a quarter size.

These are the pits or seeds that are in the middle of each smaller piece of fruit.  You supposedly can eat these too once boiled or cooked.  I didn't feel like trying that however.  

Molly absolutely loved the fruit, no surprise.  

Just thought those of you back home would be interested in seeing such a unique and wonderful fruit.  PS... my hands smelled like Jackfruit for at least a day or 2 after cutting that thing.  It got a bit nauseating after a while.  It didn't matter how many times I washed or lotioned my hands.  They still smelled like Jackfruit.  I think I've had my fill of it for a while now :)

While on the topic of new foods...Another quick photo of Kris and Molly eating at one of the local Indian restaurants.  We decided to try the North Indian Thali.  This basically means you get to sample a lot of different gravies and rice.  This by far was not the biggest Thali that I have seen, but it was extremely delicious.  What you are seeing on Kris' plate is 5 different gravies, naan, rice, curd, and a small dessert.  We are totally going to have to try this again, but maybe try the South Indian Thali next time.  

Oh and buy the way, we ordered this Thali meal, a plate of vegetable fried rice, a masala dosa, poori, a bottle of water, and a tea for only $7!!!  We couldn't believe how much food we got for that price!!  We are definitely loving the Indian food!

June in a Nutshell/Testimony Time

                    It's been awhile since I posted so I thought I would combine a few of the things that I regularly post to catch up.  I'll recap all of the happenings for the month of June, and also give a small yet amazing testimony of one of the patients from the clinic.
               
                  June was a fun month for us.  We had the wonderful opportunity to dedicate baby John at the beginning of this month.  It gave us the opportunity to share the amazing testimony of John's life with our church.  It is our prayer and promise to God, that we would raise him to know and love the Lord!

                 June 14 marked John's 4 month birthday.  We are slowly getting a bit more sleep at night and he is giggling, rolling, and becoming much more aware of his surroundings.   We think he is starting to get his first tooth, but nothing has popped through his gums yet.  We have a very cranky, drooly boy on our hands as of late.  Hopefully this won't last too much longer…that is until the next tooth decides to come!

            June also allowed us to celebrate Fathers Day!  Molly and I planned a special Fathers Day scavenger hunt for Kris.  We were also able to grill steaks and hotdogs with some friends.  This was the first time we had eaten grilled meat since moving to Bangalore.  Boy do we miss grilled MEAT!  

Kris on his surprise Fathers Day scavenger hunt

Find those clues Kris!!

Yes, Kris got a toy Nano car as his Fathers Day gift.  I just had to get it as a souvenir since we can't take our real Nano home!

We love our Daddy!

                At the end of this month we were able to go to Chennai for a fun little getaway.  The US embassy is located in Chennai, so we had to make a trip there to apply for John's passport.  It was also our 9 year wedding anniversary, so we decided to make a fun trip out of it to celebrate!  Chennai is another large city in India that is located on the South East coast of India.  It was fun to see another city in India, but traveling with a 4 month old and 4 year old is very stressful.  We decided to travel by train again.  Once you get on the train the trip is pretty nice, but getting on/off the train is a bit stressful since you only have 1 minute to get on/off.  The train stations are crowded and extremely busy, which also creates a lot of stress when trying to carry John, the luggage, and hold Molly's hand all while winding through what seems to be a million people that are also in a hurry.  (I sweat just thinking about it!)   We enlisted the help of a friendly porter to aid us in getting to the correct train car and help with our luggage.

Molly coloring on the train (It was about a 5hr ride)

                As we stepped off the train in Chennai we were greeted with the most hot and humid air I think I have ever felt.  Chennai is a city that is known for its 100+ degree heat combined with 100% humidity.  As we drove in a cab (with no A/C) to our hotel, it felt as if a blow-dryer was blowing hot air in your face.  But we had the privilege of driving in an Ambassador car…which I've always wanted to do!!

This is an example of an Ambassador (not the one that we actually rode in).

Our first ride in an Ambassador!  Super hot and fun!  It was fully carpeted in the inside with matching seats, walls, and ceiling.  The one we rode in was black and yellow.  I didn't have time to snap a pic of the outside of it!

             As soon as we arrived at our hotel we put on our swimsuits and headed to the rooftop pool!  It was John's first time "swimming"  which was super fun. He loves the water!  By the 4th day at the pool Molly learned how to swim on her own without the help of her floaties.  She thought she was pretty brave.  Most of our days were filled with swimming, eating, napping, and more eating. (The breakfast buffet alone was worth the trip!)

Rooftop swimming!

Loving the heat and loving the water!

Chillin in the hotel room!

          We were also able to see a few of the beaches in Chennai.  When you're from Iowa/South Dakota, any trip to the beach feels amazing.  Although these beaches were polluted and crowded, we managed to thoroughly enjoy it!  Molly loved jumping in the waves and I loved watching them while cuddling with my Indian boy.  (I think the sound of the waves lulled him to sleep every time).

            As I mentioned before we also celebrated our 9 year wedding anniversary on June 24th.  We started out our anniversary celebration by going to the US embassy!!  Whooo hoo!  Just kidding.  It's just how the appointment worked out…totally not on purpose.  But all joking aside, we were approved for his passport and certificate of birth abroad.  I am also happy to say that 1 week and 3 days later the passport arrived in the mail!  (You can't even get a passport that quick when you are living in America).       It is somewhat of a relief to have it in hand, so that if we had to leave the country in an emergency, we would be able to do so.  We did end our anniversary on a good note, however.  We went to a wonderful North Indian restaurant, which had the best Indian food that I've tasted since arriving here.  For dessert we were treated to a beautiful cake from Jude and Roopa, which I ate half of it myself…yummy!  (I LOVE CAKE!!)

                 Now for a quick testimony.  This is always my favorite thing to write about because it reminds me of God's purpose in having us live here in India.  This testimony, in my opinion, is nothing short of a miracle.  This particular patient is a female in her 50s that suffered a stroke during childbirth 25 years ago.  She suffered from eclampsia and her baby was taken by emergency c-section.  Due to the eclampsia she suffered a stroke and was left with many debilitating symptoms.  She presented to Kris with right sided weakness, low back and leg pain, difficulty walking and speaking, and urinary incontinence at night.  Her condition was so poor that it took nearly 15 minutes just to get her to lye face down on the adjusting table.  She even threw up several times due to this position.  Despite all this Kris was able to perform the adjustment.  After seeing this patient Kris came home and said to me that it might not be worth her coming for treatments because it was so difficult and stressful on the patient to receive it. So we prayed for her with hope that God would help her in some way if possible.  

      Well God answered our prayers and she came again for a second treatment a week later.  Her family was happy to report that she no longer had any low back and leg pain.  But the biggest miracle of all was that she stopped having urinary incontinence at night.   She was also able to lye down on the table face down without throwing up.  We are definitely praising God for this miracle in her life.  Kris has only seen her 2 times now, so we are excited to see what will happen with more chiropractic treatments.  

       Kris has many, many, many more wonderful stories that he would love to share if he only had more time to write them all down for you.  These patients present with many complex issues that Kris has to treat.  It is not only basic neck and back problems, but also problems that occur all throughout the body. From allergies to strokes, and hiatal hernias to depression and anxiety.  He has successfully treated many patients with any and almost every problem.   He is truly seeing patients from all over India.   People fly in for a week at a time just to get treatments from him.  He has seen patients from Delhi, Mumbai, Chennai, Coimbatore,  Hyderabad, and many more far away places around India.  We are so excited that God is using Kris to bring healing to many people around India.  (Kris would never write any of these things about himself, so I get to brag about how awesome he is at what he does).  

      Once again, thanks for tuning in to see what we've been up to.  Thanks also for the continued thoughts and prayers.  We have good days and bad days so we love to hear any words of encouragement or scriptures that the Lord may place on your heart for us.  Blessings!